Henri Büsser

Not enough men wear those fantastic balance-y glasses like that guy from The Matrix who's married to Zoe from Joss Whedon's "Firefly" (I'm a selective sci-fi tv nerd, ok?). Also, I might've gotten that wrong. Oh well.

Also, not enough men wear ties that are effectively just pieces of ribbon, interestingly knotted. My friend Theo does, but he has less musical ability than my father, but all this is meaningless unless you know these people, so don't mind me.

Otherwise, I know nothing about this composer. PAR FOR THE COURSE, REALLY.

At least they're talented...

'BLOG!' She says! 'Blog NOW!' And so I oblige. Never mind the precious seconds ticking away like sand through an hourglass, every moment taking us closer to death. Never mind the staggering inevitability of our own mortality engulfing every waking second with its ominous presence. We're all going to die and the whole world is awful, but sometimes composers are attractive. So I spose it's ok.

Every so often I do a little thing called teaching people to play the piano, hence I own an AMEB Manual of Syllabuses. My alcohol addled brain actually could not think of a single composer I might like to search for images of so I pulled out the horrendously large book and started to google every single composer in the piano syllabus. From this I learned that if you google "Hensel" you get stuff about some conjoined twins, and if you google "Moscheles" you get some of the most incredible mutton chop sideburns in history. Then I got bored and gave up.
SO
before the weight of the world crushes me to the point where my fingers can no longer type and I can no longer right-click-save images, these are my findings.

Ernst von Dohnanyi reminds me of a bartender I've seen drunk many many times, only better looking.


Charles-Valentin Alkan looks fairly sweet behind all his facial hair, but then, I'm a fan of french-men.


Adolph Henselt was possibly the inspiration for the film "Coneheads"


and finally, Moszkowski had a Moustache-Wars worthy Mo.


The moral of this story is, never study music. And if you do, never start a blog about composers.
Or if you do, don't bother looking through the AMEB piano syllabus. Everyone's Ugly.

David Byrne

Ok, this requires a bit of maths. You know that bit in the middle where the two circles intersect? I forget what's called, but it's A int B or something like that.

ANYWAY let's imagine that the circle on the left is my dad's taste in music, and the circle on the right is mine. I am increasingly surprised by how large this intersect-y bit is growing.

Latest addition to the middle bit is Talking Heads - obviously, I'm the one who came a bit late to this rather fabbo band, but that's ok. It's gone on my "safe to put on in the car when driving with dad because he likes it" list, and it's fun and a bit nuts and is good.

ANYWAY ONCE AGAIN the lovely gentleman above is David Byrne, a rather important member of said fantastic band.

And he's the alternative musician who just keeps on giving - from skinny gravity defying man in high waisted white pants to artsy scarf to distinguished silver fox (you're welcome for the extra Thom Yorke, by the way).

OH WAIT you need his composer credentials. He composed stuff for Big Love (squee!), and lots of other things I don't care for.

FACTS STOLEN FROM IMDB:

+ listed under Trademark - "edgy persona". Please put that on my gravestone.

+ Talking Heads has a rather wonderful song called "Psycho Killer" (of which Kate Miller-Heidke does a great operatic cover). Dear David's friend Barbara Conway used that phrase to describe things she thought were cool. In the 80s, Conway was murdered by a female stalker. AWKWARD AND UNFUNNY IRONY.

Brian Eno

Brian Eno: father of ambient music, composer of film scores such as many alternative films I'm not cool enough to have seen, also The Lovely Bones.

Also, crazy strange ambiesexual androgynous babebot, who seems to have zinced the whole side of his nose and one bit of his forehead. I'm enjoying the hair, though.

Jonathan Wolff

This beardy bit of goodness is Jonathan Wolff, who is excellent for several reasons:

+ his last name is not just "Wolf", it's "Wolff".

+ he wrote the original music for Seinfeld.

+ he wrote the original music for Will & Grace.

+ he wrote the original music for Married with Children, Who's the Boss, Caroline in the City, and many other shows I care for very little, which is why they're lumped together in one bullet point.

+ he has a good beard.

Reasons he is not excellent:

+ his picture is too small.

+ he wrote the music for The King of Queens and According to Jim.

Dario Marianelli

ALMOST SILVER FOX HELLO.

Eleven other people that read this blog (sometimes), meet Dario Marianelli. He composes for films such as "Pride & Prejudice" (the Keira one, mamadess) "V for Vendetta" and "Atonement". He also does quite a good job of sitting at a piano and staring meaningfully through the computer screen INTO YOUR SOUL.

Also, he has Harry Potter on the bookshelf behind him. Extra points.

Ben Foster

So, the man is not a composer.

HOWEVER Evan-face did set a precedent with his ONE AND ONLY POST for people to post conductors, so I've got something going for me. ALSO this man (who has a bit of the Matt Bellamy, no?) is a conductor AND an arranger, so that gives him extra points. Need more convincing? He's conductor and arranger for Doctor Who. And the delightful picture above includes a banner with the TARDIS in it. I think that's enough points for everyone.

Apologies for the excess of capitals. I have no issues, but some people are sensitive.

WAIT last minute correction!

He is a composer, for European film makers and such.

That's all.

Karl Goepfart

I'm sorry, I know that the picture is tiny, and that he's not really much of a babe, BUT HIS NAME IS GOEPFART.

Also, I appear to have run out of composers. Yup, none left. I'll have to start cataloguing attractive luthiers next. That'll be good.

Manuel Maria Ponce

Well, of course when I look for another moustachioed composer, I find a suitably NON moustachioed one. Manuel Maria (*snigger*) Ponce, the amazing Spanish composer who wrote some awesome stuff for guitar DESPITE THE FACT HE DIDN'T PLAY THE INSTRUMENT!!!!!!!!!!!!

So find attached a moustache I made myself. As well as the unphotoshopped (or un MS Paint-ed) version.

I will try better next time... :P

Paul Le Flem

Epic moustache competition you say? WELL THEN, epic moustache competition you will get!!



Now to be completely honest, I've never actually heard a single composition by Paul Le Flem, I merely discovered him whilst being nerdy and google-ing composers for the express purpose of posting them on here. You see, I care for this blog so much that I would put aside my ever so glamorous and busy life, being an important musician and stuff, to post this. (Oh how I wish that were true. I don't have much of a life at the moment, pity me.) ANYWAY
Aside from being called Paul LE FLEM, which I think is a name funny enough in itself to warrant a post, he had an AMAZING AWESOME SWEET MO. I actually think he's fairly attractive too, I mean, his collar is too big for his tie, and he has silly glasses, but really, if all men were perfect us women would have nothing to do.
Also he lived to be 103, evidently the effect of having such wonderful facial hair. FACIAL HAIR FOR ALL!!!

Jules Massenet

I am dreadfully, completely and terribly apologetic for the poor image quality of today's hirsute hunk, but Google Images just wants me to die tonight.

I know very little about Massenet, but what I do know is that my appreciation of men with facial hair has increased very exponentially (SHUT UP I DID METHODS) this year. Whilst I'm still not a fan of ill-considered moustaches or bum fluff, I really dig what Jules has got going here. A bit of staring-into-the-middle-distance work, embracement of his slightly receding widow's peak, a nice bit of neck-wear that isn't quite a bow tie or cravat, and some really well crafted beardness.

Jules, baby!

(Points for stupid mid 00's ad reference? Accepted.)

Enrique Granados

I'm sorry, did someone just start an epically moustached composer duel?
METHINKS SO.
Only the Spanish *shakes head, but not in the dismissive way you are now thinking, but coupled with a half grin, and also while looking upwards, making it more of a laughy head shake*

Victorin Joncières

Holidays can be tough. You tell yourself to take a break, from all the stress of going into uni three days a week for seventeen hours of class. But then you say to that voice in your head, "NO! It WAS quite stressful, there were assignments and group performances and recitals. I practiced all the time. I deserve to spend the majority of my three months of holidays on facebook, discovering new blogs to waste my time reading."

But then you realise that no, if you are to be any kind of musician, you need to practice. Even when there's nothing pressing. That's the point of practice.

But then you look at some of your pieces for next year, and you say, "Jeez random French guy, do I REALLY have to play eleven notes in one crotchet beat? Really?" and everything's just a bit too hard.

And that's when you flick open "24 Short Concert Pieces for Flute and Piano" (or insert instrument relevant 3rd - 5th grade AMEB standard compendium) and remind yourself of past exams and school concerts, and make a lot of the same mistakes you used to, but also make yourself happy because you don't have to take so many breaths, and you understand what phrases do now, and you're all round just that bit better.

And then you google Victorin Joncières and think "hey man, cool moustache."

And then you post his picture with annoying Getty Images stamp partially obscuring said stunning

mo to your obscure little in-joke blog with its readership of mainly your music friends and that one

random guy, and you are happy and finally go to bed.

Fin.